Comments...

Why does no one ever leave comments? I really don't think anyone reads this anyways. Regardless, I am doing this for myself.. I'll look back one day and have a diary.

So I am sitting in the University of Leeds computer clusters, feeling a bit odd and slightly nostalgic realizing that I haven't updated my blog in a while. Without a computer, it's quite hard to get around to doing it; hopefully, I'll have a computer this week. I think I'm buying a Mac, which excites me.

Leeds is, well... Leeds. My friends are good, nothing has changed and the town is still as gritty and rough around the edges as ever. I still like it here though. I'm really enjoying rekindling with my friends, drinking heavily and going back to the old haunts. I don't see myself coming back here much; too much history and my friends will all be gone next year. I'll probably return for another weekend in the Spring, as a final farewell of this place, peresay.

It is emotional here. I no doubt have been a wreck as of late, but I'm not going into that. Maybe wreck isn't the right word; just emotional, I guess. I have some of the best times of my life in the city, but everything has to come to an end at some point. A big house party tonite seems like the corker, then.

I have quite a busy week coming up, but what week isn't busy, ya know? After a massive presentation on Monday, I have to catch up on all my readings, go buy a computer, get it all spiffied up and just try and get back on track. Things are a bit of a mess... an organized mess, but a mess regardless.

I'm going to Prague to see my mom in November. That'll be nice.

peace-

Computer Hell...

I still don't have my computer back. 18 days and counting. I feel like a rich, spoiled Westerner when I complain about lacking my computer, but under these circumstances, having it would be extremely beneficial to my well being. Like tonite, for example; I missed a deadline on an article due today because of a late interview. It must, absolutely must, be submitted tonite. So instead of returning home after 12 straight hours at school, I have to go to my friend Jared's and use his, or go to an internet cafe. Ah, the lack of personality. If it wasn't for my Ipod, I'd be in a catharsis.

This is not a good week. Prepping to go to Leeds; I'm swamped... Huge presentation next Monday as well. Plus that day is Yom Kippur. Ah well...

Hey...

My computer is still broken. I feel swamped without it. More later.

Hi,

Another sunny day in Amsterdam. I'm starting to feel inundated, well actually drowning for that matter, in work. School is the most arduous, as the reading continues to mount within any hope of reprieval. In addition, I have a major presentation (3hrs+!) next week, papers due and more and more reading. It's not that I'm not enjoying the reading, because for the most part, I am... There is just so much. I don't know if a PhD is really the road I want to travel down; a research MA is hard enough.

Right now I'm beefing up on the theories abound in collective memory, given from the father figure of the discipline, Maurice Halwachs. He basically states that our memory is formed and directed in a collective manner - meaning, it's the people and groups around you and how you communicate them that shape memory. It's very marxist, but it makes sense. I have to write a response paper on it. Fun! Also, I'm reading up on the historiography surrounding the epic, and if epics are worthwhile in contemporary society. Think about that one...

I'm still figuring out how to link this to my indie rock theorem, and I have decided that I want to focus on two important websites that breed pretension in the industry; pitchfork and suicide girls. They are intrinsically different, but propose similar idealogies concerning style, fashion and music. I haven't figured out which theorists I'm going to connect this too, but I have many ideas brewing in my head.

I get my computer back tomorrow, hopefully fixed along with my external HD, also hopefully fixed. Tomorrow is a big day; I have a job interview, an appt for my tax number (my last immigration issue) and a dinner for Rosh Hashannah with some newly found Jewish friends. I also have to find time to read and research throughout, in addition to keeping up with job-work.

Things otherwise are unchanged. Life is good, all things considering, even though I have my 'alli' moments, as I call em, which come and go. I still feel like this is home though, and that is extremely important. Now if I could stop procrastinating and become as smart as everyone else - cause I'm the resident idiot - then all will be sorted.

peace-

Hi,

Well, lots of good news and bad news lately. I'll start with the bad news.

My computer crashed again. I think the back light died, as I can plug it into another monitor and it works fine. I took it to another place for fixing, and if all is well, I should have my external HD and computer up and running by Friday. I put myself on the waiting list for a new MAC, but I'm going to wait till I can afford a PowerBook Pro before I buy a new computer.

Good news, I finalized my trip to ICELAND! I received a press ticket to the festival and am in the process of booking all my travel plans. This means I'll be in London also for the a period of time in October, in addition to Reykjavik. The festival website is located HERE, so check it out.

Life has been busy. I wish I had time to see some of the wonderful friends I've made, but I've been swamped. The readings are piling up, the dutch homework takes tons of time (but it's helping) and the assignments are beginning. School is still absolutely enthralling, so I'm not complaining. I just had a class on Michel Serres, a philosopher new to me but whom I now admire. I recommend him to anyone interested in growing as an intellect page by page. He has been de-legitimized in academia apprantely, but I don't care... I loved it.

My bike is back up and running, and I also booked a trip to Geneva in December to see Eamon, Farhad and Meghan. On top of that, my dad is taking me on a Cruise December 22-29, so I will be HOME for NYE. Make plans.

No more real news... thinking... thinking... I still have yet to get a Sofi nummer, the social insurance or security number here, but that should happen within the next few weeks... I'm genuinely happy though, and I think Alli's spirit has a lot to do with that...

Best-

Hello.

I haven't posted all week. I really haven't had that much to post about. I'm just busy at work... really really busy... and I don't really think that's an entertaining blog post.

I will have Iceland finalized by Monday, which I'm really excited about. This weekend will be uneventful because of my workload. I hope to go to Almere and see Dele Sosimi, Fela Kuti's keyboardist in Afrika 80. I have to buckle down and giv'r work style to get to go though. I've had a productive day thusfar, which is good.

I think the Jewish holidays are soon. I should check up on that. More later.

It was too hot today for pictures... next time.

Research focus... research focus... I have been pondering what I want to write about for my final papers this semester and ultimately, my thesis. Everybody at school has some sort of pedagogical research focus and I'm drawing a blank with myself. I want to write about indie rock, theorize the pretension and the scene that we are currently enjoying or not enjoying. There is a level of pretension in indie, it's nothing new, and I'd like to like it to prescribed literacy and folklore, in some way...

well, more thinking awaits.

Howdy...

I have to take some more pictures of this city. Next post will be a picture only post. It has been gorgeous lately, so I hope it keeps up. It was amazing out today as well...

Okay, I had a lot of work to do this weekend, but I did most of it. Vice, JamBase, Relix, Pop Matters, School etc... fun fun fun. I have a few outstanding CD Reviews but those are easy anywho.

Today was, once again, a lovely day minus a few annoyances. I met my friend Gail at the Tropen Museum (Tropic Museum) for the last day of the Hindu Gods museum. It was free and colourful. I love the images in Hindu and Buddhism; they are so ostentatious and full of life. I also love elephants. After that we went to Oosterpark (East Place Park) to sit in the sun and read. She was reading up on Weber while I was mostly dicking around, reading non-academic stuff. Then like usual, I got hungry so we found some food and drink.

After returning to our bikes to say goodbye, I found that my back tire had a big puncture in it and was completely flat. If I rode it, then the tire would come off the wheel frame and I'd go flying, and it was unpatchable, so I had no choice but to walk. To preface my frustration, I just patched my front tire, which busted last week. Now, poetic justice came and bit me in the ass. Anywho, Oosterpark is about an hour's walk from my flat, and it was hot and sunny. Better yet, I wore my sandles and developed blisters whilst walking. I got home, frustrated and pissed off about my tire. I'll fix it tomorrow.

Back to the grind tomorrow. While I am backing out of a cultural studies of sexuality course because it does not fit my schedule this semester, the class is going on a tour of the Red Light District tomorrow and then drinks, so I'm going to join them. Why the hell not, ya know?

till next time...

Weekends...

Well, this is my 70th post. That's quite a few for me. I hope people are reading :). This is the easiest way to find out how life is in Amsterdam! Or you can call me :)

Anyway, my last post was fairly negative, and all that has reversed itself and worked itself out. Surprisingly or not, the past few days have been lovely. Absolutely lovely. I sorted out some extremely important immigration paperwork yesterday, went to an amazing dinner party hosted by my University where I met loads of people and have genuinely been happy. It's been sunny the past few days - including today - and despite an insane workload, I'm content. Really content.

There is not much to report on. I had a lovely conversation with the head of my program, who used to teach a Canadian Literature Class at Vrije Universteit, the other Uni in Amsterdam. We harked on about Atwood and Highway, which was lovely. This place is so intellectually stimulating. I feel free, wonderful, challenged, pressured and most importantly, happy. I think Alli has something to do with this.

Another Lovely Day...

I'm being sarcastic. Today has been tough. I accidentally pissed off some good friends of mine today - although I didn't mean to - and I hope they forgive me. Time does heal all wounds, and I'm hoping all works out. Other than that, things are status-quo. I always remember the saying that if you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all. I'm learning how true that is, because when I make one mistake after doing things relatively right for years, it really dents how I feel. I feel like crap, and I deserve to. I'm sorry guys.

-Shain

Today is Alli's 27th Birthday. Happy Birthday Alli.

Here We Go Again...

Well, I had this grandiose post that, when written, felt like one of my best posts ever on Monday, but somehow my embryonic knowledge of dutch keyboards deleted it before I posted it. Therefore, I'm going to try and recreate it as best as I can.

First I am going to talk about school. School is enthralling. Absolutely enthralling. This is the most challenging thing I'll have ever put myself through as of yet, but I am ready for the challenge. The courses are exactly as impressive as I thought, and my reading list is montrous, but it's all good. My professors are intimidating. For example, one of my courses, a classic text course in media studies is tought by three adjoint professors. One is the national archivist for the Netherlands and the other two are best selling authors. In Cultural Analysis, my core course is tought by the head of the faculty who just came from Northwestern University. Plus, both courses are small (15-20) and contain people from all over the world. Atleast ten nationalities are represented in each. It's amazing. I feel extremely un-exotic when surrounded by people from Korea, Ghana, Puerto Rico, the US, Russia, Netherlands, Belgium, Indonesia etc... Plus, half of my course already have their MA and are going for a second because this is the best course in Europe in Cultural Analysis. I am one lucky, extremely frightened duck.

As for how I'm doing integrating, their are ups and downs. Today I suffered a major setback, when I realized that the girl who helped me with my initial residence permit fucked up, accidentally checking the 'not allowed to work' box instead of the right 'allowed to work' box. I am legally allowed to work, but without proper documentation, I can't apply for a tax number and therefore can't get paid. Therefore, I'm working here, somewhat illegally for the time being and not getting paid, while all my work is being bankrolled until I sort this out. It could take weeks, maybe a month to sort this out.

The red tape in the Netherlands is to the likes of which I have seen. It is amazing how much protocol you have to go through to integrate. It borders insanity. I believe this is because despite the veil of Holland being a liberal, welcoming society, they are actually extremely inclusive and xenophobic. They don't want people here, and make your life hell as a result. It's hard accepting the fact that you are a foreigner, first and foremost. Not a person in the system, but a foreigner. I know it will all work out, but patience is a virtue. My bank account is still not entirely sorted, as my Internet Banking requires a seperate application that the bank initiates and I've yet to receive the documentation. Fun.

Okie... more...

My computer crashed on Thursday and I just got it back today. Unfortunately I have some issue with my Internet settings and cannot access MSN Messenger yet, but everything else is sorted. My external HD crashed as well, which made my heart sink, but it's being fixed for a pretty penny. 100GB of music is on there, and losing it would be heartwrenching. Thankfully I backed up 3/5ths of it on my Ipod. I should have that back by the end of the week. I apologize to any and all who I've neglected throughout this process. Being without a computer was a bitch, but somewhat liberating.

Oh, and I discovered I have cable. 4 English channels taboot. Law and Order last nite was a blast.

Now onto how I've been getting by with the locals here. There seems to be a bunch of lovely folk at school, and I have get togethers both Thursday and Friday to get to know them more. I've had my lovely friend Deja Gordon here since Friday, and she's staying another week, so it's been nice having a Canadian pal here to gripe with. We spent the weekend together, doing nothing much but walking around the city. We did see Malian singer Mory Kante at the Seven Seasons Outdoor Fest here in Amsterdam on Saturday and it was fantastic. It was on a barge set up on Reguliersgracht Canal. He had a nine piece traditional band. Fantastic. Tonite I'm off to see Cursive.

Other than that, it's been status quo. Some days are emphatically lovely and other wreched, but I'm getting by. Some days homesick, others travel-sick. I found a super cheap plane ticker to Leeds on Jet2 and will be there Sep 28 - Oct 1 for the weekend, and plans are still in the works to go to Iceland for the Airwaves Festival. I am excited for both. I am also trying to find a way to get on Birthright, but that will have to wait till next week when the European selection process begins. More on that later.

In closing, everyday is an adventure and a challenge. Walking around knowing nothing of the language is tough, and often I feel either ignorant or an idiot. Meeting the dutch is tough too, but slowly but surely I'm meeting some amazing people. I feel like I'm growing shy, or at least more shy, because I'm so intimidated socially and intellectually right now. I'm trying to be more forward, but it is a challenge. I have identified this, and I believe I've gotten through the first step of being more social and open... I just sometimes don't know what I can contribute to conversations, when culturally or ideologically, they are beyond my scope. Things are improving though.

Lastly, tomorrow was supposed to be Alli's 27th Birthday. I miss her more than I've missed anyone before, and I love her everyday. Happy Birthday Alli. I miss you and I love you.

Till Next Time...

Well,

I just wrote a story of a post that was once of my best in weeks and the computer crashed. Now I have class and my post disappeared. I'll re-do it as best I can tomorrow, or later tonite maybe.

Entertaining day...

Firstly, I came home to find my external HD, with 100 gigs of music on it not responding or showing anything on it. I took it a PC Dr. place and they showed me that the HD is okay, but for some reason it won't respond to ever-becoming-crap computer. Tomorrow I'm heading there with my comp to see if they can fix it. I'm praying this fixes itself.

Also, today was my grad school orientation. It was kind of anti-climactic, but I met some lovely people and got my UvA e-mail addy. I have my first class Monday at 10AM. Whoopee!